Keanu Comes In Fourth

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So, remember back on March 19th, I ran a story about Keanu Reeves running in this year’s Toyota Celebrity Race at the Long Beach GP? Well, that happened over this past weekend, and Keanu managed to ‘whoa’ his way into (drum roll please) fourth place. So tia, Anakin McFly, LucaM and Sue this follow up is for you.

OK, so Keanu, a man who tried to make an acting career out of using the word ‘whoa’ in new and novel ways decided to try his hand at racing. Nothing wrong with that, as long as he doesn’t let it go to his head and start taking up valuable real estate on the track a la Jason Priestley. Sadly, he didn’t exactly acquit himself with flying colors. Keanu came in fourth place (see John Surtees about what coming second means and double that sentiment), although that did translate into winning in the celeb class. Yeah, I know what you’re going to say, but don’t go flying off the handle just yet. KR was actually sitting in third place amongst the celebs, sixth overall when two of his fellow actor/competitors argued about the same piece of road going into turn one, and BOOM, just like that, Keanu was gifted with first place. There’s winning by your own merits, and then there’s having a win handed to you, and this is the second type. Sure, many a race has been wont hat way, just as Johnny Rutherford, but it’s a default way to get to the top step; lacking, in other words.

It gets even better, since the celebrity podium looked like this:

4. Keanu Reeves (Celebrity Winner – Speed, The Matrix)
5. Ken Baker (E! TV)
6. Carlos Mencia (Mind of Mencia)

Wow, Keanu was able to best a host from a network that is nothing more than a dumbed-down Entertainment Tonight (as if that is even possible), and a guy who can’t even use his real name when making Hispanic jokes or getting in fights with the likes of C-list personalities like Joe Rogan. I guess stacking the grid with kids from the local blind school might have made it too steep of a climb.

Congratulations Keanu. Say hi to Juan Manuel Fangio when you get the chance.

Source: PaddockTalk

About The Author

Tony Borroz grew up in a sportscar oriented family, but sadly, it was British cars. His knuckles still show the marks of slipped Whitworth sockets, strains to reach upper rear shock bushings on Triumphs, and slight burn marks from dealing with Lucas Electric “systems.” He has written for a variety of car magazines and websites, Automoblog chief among them. Tony has worked on popular driving games as a content expert, in addition to working for aerospace companies, software giants, and as a movie stuntman. He currently lives in a secure, undisclosed location in the American southwestern desert.

6 Comments on "Keanu Comes In Fourth"

  1. tia

    Wow thanks for the write up!!! However I have been reading and watching the articles and videos of this race. What you failed to mention is that all cars were bunched because of a restart. Danny Way lost focus as did Fonsworth Bentley. Keanu stayed on focus, on speed, a avoided the wreck which happend only a second or two prior to him getting there. It was not just handed to him. But I know -You can't give Keanu his due no matter what right??? His fellow racers did. Well-all but Way!!

  2. LucaM

    well, thank you :D you're kind… in your own special way.

    I guess ;)

    as a side note, please allow me to remind you that the winner is the one who finishes the race ( underline finish) first. end of story.

    (and Way seems to lack the notion of fair-play, but that's his problem… )

  3. YvieS1

    "Wow, Keanu was able to best a host from a network that is nothing more than a dumbed-down Entertainment Tonight (as if that is even possible), and a guy who can’t even use his real name when making Hispanic jokes or getting in fights with the likes of C-list personalities like Joe Rogan. " Wow, that doesn't sound self-righteous at all. So you're defining someone's ability to race well by their career choice? Sorry, but that's a poorly supported argument to begin with.

    As for having your win handed to you, it's not as though Reeves just showed up and someone waltzed up to him with first place on a silver platter. He still had to complete the race. Every single one of the other competitors had the exact same opportunity to win. Danny Way didn't have to crash, and what would you have done differently, anyway? You see a crash, you avoid it. Would you have preferred Reeves go careening into the mess of metal on purpose 'just to be fair'? Grow up, stop treating the situation as though someone cheated on a board game, and let the man enjoy his well-deserved victory.

  4. queen182

    As I was yelling from the patio to Mr. Way…"That's racing…that's racing". I come from a long time race family…I know the power of duct tape :). I understand his feelings, thing is..usually you just tell your family and friends. Ahh well, hope they all atleast had fun, as no one got hurt Thankfully!

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