Do we have a section for stories pertaining to “Semi-Useless Crap That Only Stupid Americans Would Buy?” If we do, here’s another addition for it.
What you see here is a gizmo that allows you keep your French fries stationed close at hand using a cup holder slot. It even has a holder for ketchup.
I can’t begin to tell you how many different ways this makes my skin crawl. First off: drive the car. Second: DRIVE THE CAR. Thirdly: you shouldn’t be eating while driving. Fourth: Ketchup!
Honest to God, ketchup?
What’s wrong with you people?
Look I like fries, and I really like fries with ketchup (it’s kind of the whole point, no?). Eating fries while driving not only takes away from the enjoyment of the fries, it also adds to the lack of control you have over the car. Also, it’s next to impossible to apply the ketchup to the fries, negating a large part of the whole fry experience (see above).
Honest to God, ketchup? How did that get in there? Did the geniuses (and by geniuses I mean knuckle-dragging baboons) that came up with this “must have” accessory do some field testing and say, “You know what would make this PERFECT? If we were to integrate a KETCHUP HOLDER in there too!!”
If they did, if that really was the “thought” process that went into designing this, then I have an even lower opinion of humanity than I did before.
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